The left slip of my set of slippers has been steadily in decline this past year. True I have had them for many years now, and they have done their duty, but retirement I fear is upon us. Throughout the latter part of college, whilst living in a fraternity mind you, they have survived. Through crazy midnight runs to Taco Bell, they have survived. Transplanted to New York City to be used in what some would say is more like a closet, thus limiting their abuse, they did not survive.
I am sorry dear slippers, but drastic measures must now be taken. No more will you drag on the ground. I have only my deepest love and gratitude towards you. You may still get one last wash, for your odor holdability, while amazing, is not generally wanted, for foot sweat you do bring out. I appologize now for sending you to surgery curtesy of yours truly, Dr. Lampboy. Good luck.
